The Heart of a Pastor Blog

Clergy Appreciation Month

(Don't fight it. If it happens, let it happen.)

The Apostle Paul wrote to the church in Ephesus from a prison cell in Rome. He wrote to a church that was located in and around the temple of Diana. It was a pagan city devoted to idolatry. It must have been a very difficult assignment for the elders of the fledgling church — not so unlike what many of you have been called to. Paul reminds his friends that there must be balance between what we believe and how we act out our faith.

Warren Wiersbe speaks to our call: "The danger on the battlefield is that we do not take the enemy seriously and therefore fail to put on all the armor. Never underestimate the strategy and strength of the devil."

As Clergy Appreciation Month begins this week, we at Focus on the Family salute you. We are proud of you. We pray for you every week and we are constantly attempting to find new ways to engage you.

We know many of you reject the Clergy Appreciation Month concept for any number of reasons, but we believe it is very important for your congregation to celebrate with you — your calling, your assignment and your wonderful family. It becomes a win-win for all. So, if it happens, just let it happen.

Here is what we say on the ClergyAppreciation.org Web site to laymen who inquire about how they can best recognize your contribution to their lives and community:

"God has entrusted to pastors and their families one of the most precious of assignments — the spiritual well-being of the flock. That's why God has instructed us to recognize His servants."

The Bible says, "Give a bonus to leaders who do a good job, especially the ones who work hard at preaching and teaching" (1 Tim. 5:17, The Message).

Paul's last words to the church at Ephesus were, "I am sending him (Tychicus) to you ... that he may encourage you" (Eph. 6:22). Let us encourage you, my colleague. Let your people encourage you. Encourage one another.

We appreciate you! Be blessed and be a blessing.

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P.S. This blog will being going on hiatus for a little while as we ascertain its effectiveness in making a difference in the lives of pastoral families and how we should best be using the limited resources we have been given to minister to you. If you have any comments or suggestions, please contact us at pastors@family.org. Also, continue to visit us on our web site at Parsonage.org.

Having the Courage of Elijah

I don't think I would have been very comfortable being King Ahab. The Bible says in 2 Kings 16 that the king "did more evil in the eyes of the Lord than any of those (kings) before him" (v. 30). It also says King Ahab "did more to provoke the Lord ... to anger than did all the kings of Israel before him" (v. 33). He must have really been something.

Now, just imagine that you were Elijah, the prophet, and that you had been chosen to confront this evil person with a word from the Lord that would displease him very much. That assignment would not be a walk in the park, would it?

Well, my friend, the assignment that Elijah accepted could very easily be similar to the task that our Lord has for you. In a couple of months, our nation will go to the polls to express its will to our politicians, judges and other leaders. In every state and in nearly every community like yours, there will be measures and initiatives on each ballot that could have ramifications for decades to come. In many states, the definition of marriage is still at stake. In other communities, there are measures dealing with "life" issues. All over the country, there will be choices to make related to gambling, taxation and education. You, as "a kind of Elijah," have been consigned by our Lord to defend righteousness and confront evil. It is estimated that forty percent of those values voters who are registered will not vote. Why?

As the servant of God, it is your assignment to "take a stand" — not for a candidate, but, in many ways, for things much closer to home like taxes, school board initiatives and, for sure, ballot measures that could do damage to the families in your church.

Over the next several Sundays, please encourage your people to vote and, where appropriate, please guide them and help them find their way through the complicated ballots as the Scriptures direct ... and pray! Please pray that, in all things, be it our desire or not, God will be glorified.

Have a great week "Elijah" — be bold!

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Maintaining Positive Staff Relationships

As I travel about and have opportunity to talk with you and your colleagues, one of the subjects that nearly always comes up is "staff relationships." It seems that almost every lead pastor has had a difficult experience managing his or her co-workers.

Oh, I am not naive enough to think that we should expect all of our working relationships to be harmonious all of the time, but honestly, they should be most of the time. And, as I look back over my experience leading staff and seeking to find a "happy" center point from which we go about our tasks, I have learned that the following three words can go a long way in making our working arrangement satisfactory.

a) Communication: You must keep talking. You also need to know when to speak and when to keep silent. There is nothing worse than a team who is given the opportunity to join one another in ministry not knowing how the other person is feeling or thinking. That is why I believe every staff leader should attempt to touch base with his or her team at least once a day — even if it is just for a "stand-up" encounter.

b) Expectation: "Know what your job is and do it." Most staff explosions occur when either the lead or the associate do not have clear assignment expectations. If the job description is unclear, then it is impossible to grade another's performance. Too often, rather than address the lack of productivity, we let it "slip by" until it is too late.

c) Loyalty: I am amazed at how some I meet tolerate disloyalty to senior leadership. I am not talking about turning a deaf ear to things, but I am saying contention on a staff will eventually create friction throughout a congregation — perhaps even destroy that congregation. We can get along, but it takes patience and determination.

"Show proper respect to everyone. Love the brotherhood of believers" (1 Pet. 2:17). "Treat others the same way you want them to treat you" (Luke 6:31). We can get along. We just must work at it.

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Simple Praying

Remember when the Psalmist David wrote, "Teach me your way, O Lord, and I will walk in your truth" (Ps. 86:11)? He was probably referring to the things he learned both through experience and meditation after he had prayed. He seemed to keep asking God to "Hear my prayer."

I learn a lot through my private prayer life, especially when I can just grow quiet and talk to the Father as a son would talk. Do you? It's after the prayer, when I reflect on our conversation, that I most often "hear" from God or, at least, find direction.

When I pray, I find myself somewhat removed from the norm of my everyday activity. All formality aside, I just communicate my feelings and often my frustration. In the end, I don't ask for much. I just talk and, then, when it is over (my part), I listen.

There were a lot of years in which I was guided by the "A-C-T-S" formula for praying. But as the years have passed, my time with the Lord is less emotional, not as animated, and much more conversational. I still wonder why we make such a "show" of prayer in public and why we need to pray so predictably.

I read again today Matthew, chapter 6, and our Lord's instruction regarding simple prayer. Remember what He said before He taught them how to pray?

"And when you come before God, don't turn that into a theatrical production either. Here's what I want you to do: find a quiet, secluded place so you won't be tempted to role-play before God. Just be there as simply and honestly as you can manage. The focus will shift from you to God, and you will begin to sense His grace" (Matt. 6:6 — The Message).

I find that the wording of Matthew 6:6 in The Message says it the way I need to hear it. It will say about the same in whatever Bible you read. Keep it simple!

Oh, and to David's point, God listens when His children humbly and faithfully seek His face.

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Bloom Where You Are Planted

A phrase that I have used a lot in my nearly two decades as a pastor-to-pastor is "Bloom where you are planted." In other words, make the most of your present situation. Don't look back and don't look ahead. Live in the moment and expect God's blessings upon the assignment He has given you.

The irony of all this is that I recently had the opportunity to visit the two cities in which I pastored before coming to Focus on the Family: one in California and the other in Oregon. I didn't go there to preach or to visit my former congregation. I was there for personal reasons. I had the chance to drive around some. I drove past homes we had lived in and remembered a myriad of events concerning my family.

I passed by cemeteries where I had buried parishioners and hospitals where I had spent hours with those who called me "pastor." I ate at familiar restaurants and just happened to cross paths with several who recognized me from the past. But I don't live there any more. For years, those places were my life, but now they almost seem strange. God has me in a new place, doing different things, like a lot of you.

There was a time when I longed for a return to those places and people, but I have experienced God's new seasons. Like nature, they change and, with the passing years, we usually learn the reasons why.

I just thought some of you might be missing the present because you were bemoaning the past or maybe even fixating on the future. Please don't. Bloom where you are planted. The present is where God is at work, and His plans are for you to prosper.

If you are in a struggle right now, consider the following: thank Him for the present; confess the challenges you are facing; remember God's unmistakable love for you; see His majestic presence at work in your ministry; hold your head high; encourage your family; and, today, do something for someone who needs to know they matter — and make up your mind to bloom where you are planted.

If you need to talk or have a colleague pray with you, call us toll-free at 877-233-4455. You matter to us.

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Vindication

Dictionary definition: "to free from allegation or blame"

Have you ever been falsely accused of something? I know — silly question.

I remember back a whole bunch of years when I was being considered for a pastoral position at a fairly substantial church. I was one of the finalists and, at the meeting when the ultimate decision was to be made, my name was placed in front of the board for a vote. Just before the ballots were distributed, the organizational leader said, "Now, you understand that H.B. has had an emotional breakdown." Well, as you might imagine, that was the end of my consideration. Another man was chosen.

The truth was that, a few months before, I had a virus of some kind that held me bedfast for several weeks. Evidently, the rumor mill had me "half crazy" and unable to perform the duties assigned to the leader of a congregation.

I was devastated — not so much because I didn't get the job, but that people everywhere thought I was "nuts," so to speak. Even my mom called to say she had heard I was emotionally unstable.

Well, time and circumstances have a way of vindicating a person who has been falsely accused of something, but it does not erase the scars left behind or the impression in the minds of many. Those days are behind me now, but you never forget the feeling.

Some of you have gone through similar experiences. Most of us will. I learned big lessons through it all:

1. In time, the truth usually surfaces.
2. In your heart, you know what's right.
3. We most often are stronger after the dust has settled.
4. Neither revenge nor retaliation is ever the solution — nor is self-defense. All of that is God's business.
5. Forgiveness is a must. If you don't, it will eat at you like a cancer.

"Do not take revenge, my friend, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: 'It is mine to avenge; I will repay,' says the Lord" (Rom. 12:19).

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